Viw Magazine

Men's Weekly

.

  • Written by Brent Coker, Academic - University of Melbourne, University of Melbourne
Researchers found "arousal" – being alert and awake – makes us more likely to say things we later regret. Shutterstock

Christmas is a stressful time for many, so not surprisingly it’s also known as the season for arguments.

Some assume it’s because we share the time with family members, who we’re more likely to argue with because of bottled-up resentment or some other annoyance we’ve been secretly nurturing. Others put it down to alcohol.

But, in either case, under normal circumstances people are usually adept at keeping potentially hurtful comments to themselves. So why is it that we’re more likely to say things we might later regret during Christmas?

Over the past three years we’ve been studying why people say things they later regret. Released this week in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, our research discovered in eight experiments over three years the same variable consistently explains why people disclose things that cause them anguish.

From innocuous faux pas to more serious disclosures of secretive information, in each experiment we found “arousal” explains tendencies to disclose information that probably should have been concealed.


Read more: From backflips to power potato peeling: why videos go viral


Christmas is stressful, and stress leads to chronic arousal. When people are aroused, they’re more likely to say things they probably shouldn’t.

So what is arousal? And why does it cause people to say things they later regret?

Essentially, arousal is the degree to which an individual is awake and alert. You might assume being awake and alert would increase rather than decrease the accuracy of what we say – but this appears not to be the case.

The reason is because arousal uses up so-called “cognitive resources” — basically brain power. Because there are less conscious cognitive resources available for controlling what comes out of our mouths, our minds default to more automatic, and seemingly less considered, responses. When we lose conscious control over what we say, it becomes more likely we’ll disclose information that we would otherwise keep to ourselves.

Our research finds that information we’re usually careful about concealing, such as secrets and very personal information, is more likely to be disclosed when we default to more automatic responses. We found arousal makes people reveal more personal information, disclose secrets, reveal incriminating information and share frowned-upon experiences with strangers.

In our first experiment, we asked participants to write dating profiles. We evoked arousal with half the participants. They disclosed more embarrassing, emotional, intimate and even incriminating information on their dating profiles than those who were relatively relaxed.

A post-hoc study found those people who disclosed such information were less likely to be chosen for a date. The study suggests people who aren’t chilled out are viewed as less ideal partners.

In our second experiment, we found people were more likely to disclose times when they said mean or malicious things to others online, suggesting that arousal increases the disclosure of information that people do not normally like to disclose. Relaxed people, it seems, are better at concealing information and keeping secrets.

In our third study, we evoked arousal by getting people to jog on the spot for 60 seconds. The results found participants were more likely to share embarrassing stories (open up to others) after physical exercise. Usually people might disclose personal information like this to friends and family, but it seems people are more likely to open up to strangers when aroused. This finding suggests that doing physical exercise together might be a better way of getting to know someone than more docile pursuits such as sitting around.

It seems that lowering arousal is the key to gaining more control over what we say. The problem is that the times when we ought to be careful — such as job interviews, media engagements, important work meetings, or romantic encounters — are often arousing, and it is not easy to remain calm and relaxed.


Read more: Ten tips to make your holidays less fraught and more festive


So what are some things people can do to minimise unintended disclosures and save the family from a memorable Christmas for the wrong reasons?

Some techniques are known to reduce daily stress levels and are useful for situations when we’re most riled up. These approaches include consciously controlling your breathing and listening to chilled music. Other techniques for longer-term benefits mirror the advice of health professionals – reduce how much coffee you drink, eat a balanced diet and get enough sleep.

Not only do these steps make you healthier, they also reduce your stress levels and ultimately your control over what you say.

So when you’re opening your pressies or digging into your turkey this Christmas, try to chill out and relax. Turn on the music, breath deeply, and reduce the chance of saying something you might later regret.

Brent Coker does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.

Authors: Brent Coker, Academic - University of Melbourne, University of Melbourne

Read more http://theconversation.com/tis-the-season-to-say-things-we-later-regret-and-new-research-tells-us-why-127915

Designing the Ideal Healthcare Environment with a Professional Medical Centre Fitout

When it comes to healthcare spaces, functionality, hygiene, and patient comfort take top priority. An intelligently designed medical centr...

Stay Comfortable Year-Round with Ducted Cooling Melbourne

When the temperature starts to rise, having a reliable and efficient cooling system becomes a priority. With unpredictable weather and sud...

Best Practices for Content Ownership and Tagging Across Departments

Image by kaboompics on Freepik The bigger and more complex content ecosystems grow, the more valuable ownership and tagging become. In ent...

Understanding Public Liability Insurance Australia: What You Need to Know

Image by rawpixel.com on Freepik The necessity of public liability insurance in Australia is that it acts as a financial safeguard for busi...

How HID Proximity Cards Improve Workplace Security Without Slowing Down Access

In today’s workplaces, security is non-negotiable, but so is speed. Companies are under pressure to protect their people, property, and ...

Unlock Business Insights Faster with Power BI Tools

In this digital age where data drives the consumer landscape, businesses are shipping huge amounts of data every day. To remain competit...

Why Split System Installation Is a Smart Choice for Home Climate Control

Temperature control is essential for comfort, and when it comes to efficient, versatile cooling and heating, a split system is one of the ...

The Ultimate Guide to Door Replacement: Everything You Need to Know

Image by freepik Sure, swapping out a door is a fairly easy task, but it requires careful consideration of options for materials, designs...

Common Web Development Issues Perth Businesses Face (and How Agencies Fix Them)

Image by freepik Let's be honest, in the bustling heart of Perth's business scene, a website that's not up to scratch is like trying to he...

Life With Clear Aligners: 10 Small Changes That Make a Big Difference

Image by tonodiaz on Freepik Clear aligners have transformed orthodontics, offering a nearly invisible way to straighten teeth without the...

Choosing the Right Hair Loss Treatment for Your Needs

Millions of people experience hair loss globally, and it can be a major cause of emotional discomfort and self-consciousness. Hair loss ca...

Cardboard Display Boxes: An Effective Solution for Retail Presentation

In the competitive world of retail, how products are presented can be just as important as the products themselves. Cardboard display boxe...

Why Hiring a Skilled Shopify Web Developer Can Transform Your Online Store

Shopify has become one of the most popular e-commerce platforms due to its ease of use, powerful features, and scalability. However, creat...

Selling a Home Left 1 in 3 Aussies in Tears, Survey Finds

New research on selling property found that more than 1 in 3 people who sold a property in the past two years admitted to crying at some poi...

Brisbane Motor Vehicle Accident Lawyers & Motorbike Accident Claims

Motorbike accidents in Brisbane can lead to severe injuries and complex legal challenges, given the vulnerability of riders on the road. F...

Jesse Martin, OAM Sets Sail Again with Portland Roads - Sailing the Whitsundays

Jesse Martin OAM shot to fame in 1999 as the world’s youngest sailor to circumnavigate the globe – solo, unassisted and non-stop. No...

Why Modern Roller Shutters Are the Perfect Solution for Your Home or Business

Whether you're looking to secure your home or make your business more energy-efficient, modern roller shutters are a smart choice. In this...

Everything You Need to Know About the EWPA Yellow Card

The EWPA Yellow Card is an important certification in the construction and workplace safety sectors. It plays a key role in ensuring worke...

From Residential to NDIS to Commercial: How Mr Window Cleaning Covers Every Window

Not all window cleaning jobs are created equal. A quiet suburban home, a bustling retail store, and a property under an NDIS plan each com...

How Timely Duct Inspections and Repairs Improve HVAC Efficiency

You have cranked up the air conditioning, but your home still feels unevenly cooled or stuffy. Sound familiar? Many homeowners jump straig...