Viw Magazine

Men's Weekly

.

  • Written by Natalie Gately, Criminology Courses Coordinator, Edith Cowan University

Maria Exposto, a Sydney grandmother who fell victim to a romance scam and became an unwitting drug mule, couldn’t have known what was before her when she left Australia to sign documents for her fiancé so he could retire and marry her.

At 50-years-old, Exposto had fallen for a widowed special forces soldier doing his bit for his country.

They have never met, which was easily explained – he was deployed in Afghanistan. She described being “blindly in love” with a man who wooed her online, serenading her with love songs and long, deep conversations.

Exposto recently walked free after facing a death sentence in Malaysia for attempting to smuggle a kilogram of ice five years ago. Since she was caught, she has maintained she was a victim of a romance scam.


Read more: From catfish to romance fraud, how to avoid getting caught in any online scam


Sadly, Exposto’s story is not unique. Like Exposto, victims of romance scams tend to be between 45 to 54-years-old, impulsive, respond to elaborate stories and are well-educated.

Romance scammers prey on people to build a relationship and defraud their victims. They are clever, well organised and have a number of tried techniques that make them highly successful.

The extreme emotional ties formed can make victims easy to manipulate and leave them vulnerable to knowingly or unknowingly engaging in criminal activity.

More than 10 million Australians are exposed to at least one personal fraud scam each year.

And with more than 3.5 million Australians using Tinder alone, the opportunities for romance scammers is growing rapidly. In fact, online dating fraud rose by 150% in a year from 2011, with criminals recognising the opportunities to exploit those looking for a partner.

Scammers are in for the long haul

In Exposto’s case, the “relationship” had been ongoing for more than a year. This is not surprising, as romance scammers are in for the long haul and see the process as a long term investment to establish intimacy and trust. They often use teams of people to “hook” and “woo” the victim.

Scammers typically fake profiles with stolen photographs, often mimicking army officers, and frequently create a story of tragic or desperate circumstances. Armed force identities are common, as it easily explains their inability to meet in person.

Could the handsome military officer’s picture actually come from a stock image website? It’s a good idea to reverse image search the photo of your online partner. Shutterstock

It’s this willingness of the scammer to engage in a prolonged, sustained interaction that creates the belief the relationship is “real” and leading to something more permanent.

Eventually, the scammer has ensnared a person who has heavily invested in the relationship, has a strong emotional attachment and has been groomed to believe they “know and understand” their partner.

After the bond is established, scammers frequently request money to pay fictitious medical bills, help partners out of dangerous situations or pay for tickets.

Money mules

In some cases, victims can become involved in illegal activities including money laundering and bank fraud, and are at risk of being charged. These types of victims are often referred to as “money mules”.


Read more: How to get away with fraud: the successful techniques of scamming


And “mule recruitment” is when the scammer attempts to get a person to receive stolen funds and then transfer those funds to criminals overseas.

Many victims of fraud related crimes can also suffer their own financial loss, on top of facing the sudden loss of, what was to them, an important and significant intimate relationship – a “double hit”.

Victims have described the loss of the relationship as more devastating than their financial loss.

Shame and humiliation

Their experience is more psychologically damaging than other types of fraud, and is often compounded by a total lack of understanding from family and friends.

Some victims remain in denial and are unable to accept the scam or separate the fake identity with a criminal. Some realise they’ve exposed themselves or performed sexual acts online, and feel humiliated and violated. They report feeling depressed, and even suicidal.


Read more: More than just money: getting caught in a romance scam could cost you your life


And victims have said they lost trust in others, severed social ties, and suffered a lower sense of self-worth and confidence.

This social withdrawal and isolation can make victims vulnerable to a second wave of the scam, believing their online partners excuses or explanations that they really are “real”.

But victims don’t often receive social support, reporting that family, friends and colleagues thought they were stupid, or were angry with them because of the financial loss, such as losing inheritance.

Many victims keep their experience a secret or don’t disclose the entire story for fear of these types of reactions.

How can you avoid being duped?

There are ways you can avoid being scammed by a one-sided romance.

Read and take heed of the instructions on dating websites. Most have clear guidelines of how to avoid online fraud, such as being suspicious about early declarations of love, requesting or receiving money.

It’s also a good idea to use their photos to do some sleuthing online, and see what information pops up when you do a reverse image search on Google. Look for any inconsistencies, see if what they’ve told you about themselves adds up.


Read more: Why we need to do more for the victims of online fraud and scams


You can also run their email address through RomanceScams.org which lists names of known scammers.

And if you become aware a friend or family member has been victimised, remember it’s a time to provide support and understanding to break the isolation, allowing the victim to grieve over the lost relationship, rebuild their self-esteem, and try again.

The authors do not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and have disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.

Authors: Natalie Gately, Criminology Courses Coordinator, Edith Cowan University

Read more http://theconversation.com/a-handsome-soldier-with-a-medical-bill-how-romance-scammers-make-you-fall-in-love-with-them-127820

Navigating Relationships While Living with Depression

Living with depression can feel like carrying an invisible weight—one that not only affects how you experience the world but also how yo...

Choosing the Right Vinyl Flooring Suppliers for Your Home or Business

When it comes to selecting flooring options that combine durability, style, and affordability, vinyl flooring stands out as a top choice. ...

What to Expect During a Property Settlement After Separation

Separation is a challenging and emotional time, and one of the most complex aspects can be the division of property. However, understandin...

Designing the Ideal Healthcare Environment with a Professional Medical Centre Fitout

When it comes to healthcare spaces, functionality, hygiene, and patient comfort take top priority. An intelligently designed medical centr...

Stay Comfortable Year-Round with Ducted Cooling Melbourne

When the temperature starts to rise, having a reliable and efficient cooling system becomes a priority. With unpredictable weather and sud...

Best Practices for Content Ownership and Tagging Across Departments

Image by kaboompics on Freepik The bigger and more complex content ecosystems grow, the more valuable ownership and tagging become. In ent...

Understanding Public Liability Insurance Australia: What You Need to Know

Image by rawpixel.com on Freepik The necessity of public liability insurance in Australia is that it acts as a financial safeguard for busi...

How HID Proximity Cards Improve Workplace Security Without Slowing Down Access

In today’s workplaces, security is non-negotiable, but so is speed. Companies are under pressure to protect their people, property, and ...

Unlock Business Insights Faster with Power BI Tools

In this digital age where data drives the consumer landscape, businesses are shipping huge amounts of data every day. To remain competit...

Why Split System Installation Is a Smart Choice for Home Climate Control

Temperature control is essential for comfort, and when it comes to efficient, versatile cooling and heating, a split system is one of the ...

The Ultimate Guide to Door Replacement: Everything You Need to Know

Image by freepik Sure, swapping out a door is a fairly easy task, but it requires careful consideration of options for materials, designs...

Common Web Development Issues Perth Businesses Face (and How Agencies Fix Them)

Image by freepik Let's be honest, in the bustling heart of Perth's business scene, a website that's not up to scratch is like trying to he...

Life With Clear Aligners: 10 Small Changes That Make a Big Difference

Image by tonodiaz on Freepik Clear aligners have transformed orthodontics, offering a nearly invisible way to straighten teeth without the...

Choosing the Right Hair Loss Treatment for Your Needs

Millions of people experience hair loss globally, and it can be a major cause of emotional discomfort and self-consciousness. Hair loss ca...

Cardboard Display Boxes: An Effective Solution for Retail Presentation

In the competitive world of retail, how products are presented can be just as important as the products themselves. Cardboard display boxe...

Why Hiring a Skilled Shopify Web Developer Can Transform Your Online Store

Shopify has become one of the most popular e-commerce platforms due to its ease of use, powerful features, and scalability. However, creat...

Selling a Home Left 1 in 3 Aussies in Tears, Survey Finds

New research on selling property found that more than 1 in 3 people who sold a property in the past two years admitted to crying at some poi...

Brisbane Motor Vehicle Accident Lawyers & Motorbike Accident Claims

Motorbike accidents in Brisbane can lead to severe injuries and complex legal challenges, given the vulnerability of riders on the road. F...

Jesse Martin, OAM Sets Sail Again with Portland Roads - Sailing the Whitsundays

Jesse Martin OAM shot to fame in 1999 as the world’s youngest sailor to circumnavigate the globe – solo, unassisted and non-stop. No...

Why Modern Roller Shutters Are the Perfect Solution for Your Home or Business

Whether you're looking to secure your home or make your business more energy-efficient, modern roller shutters are a smart choice. In this...